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Roll up your window. Let's do a pressed ham under glass.
Roll up your window. Let's do a pressed ham under glass.
And then there's Maude.
And then there's Maude.
Do your thing, where you lie to everyone.
Do your thing, where you lie to everyone.
am not going to compromise
am not going to compromise
No more nuts.
No more nuts.
I understand. Could you slide your shorts down, please?
I understand. Could you slide your shorts down, please?
And Leon's getting larger!
And Leon's getting larger!
I can't! I won't.
I can't! I won't.
So what? A lot of older men have that.
So what? A lot of older men have that.
Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude. Yeah.
Yeah, but he's a pervert, Dude. Yeah.
You got T-Fal? No, Calphalon.
You got T-Fal? No, Calphalon.
Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax.
Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax.
Yeah, he's dating a crayon.
Yeah, he's dating a crayon.
I got a rash, man. Fucking A.
I got a rash, man. Fucking A.
Still, still! I like to go in fresh!
Still, still! I like to go in fresh!
Hey, Elaine, try the beef, 'cause that's real au jus sauce.
Hey, Elaine, try the beef, 'cause that's real au jus sauce.
No, he's a sex offender with a record.
No, he's a sex offender with a record.
I'm gonna call her. No, don't call.
I'm gonna call her. No, don't call.
You come in the house, you wipe your wheels.
You come in the house, you wipe your wheels.
What am I supposed to do with all this paella?
What am I supposed to do with all this paella?
Well, there isn't a literal connection, Dude.
Well, there isn't a literal connection, Dude.
I'm calling. Get away from me. Jerry, don't. Give me the phone.
I'm calling. Get away from me. Jerry, don't. Give me the phone.
But, suddenly, a new contender has emerged.
But, suddenly, a new contender has emerged.
If I can't play tennis, I have no reason to live.
If I can't play tennis, I have no reason to live.
To the idiot-mobile.
To the idiot-mobile.
I'm not driving him to the airport!
I'm not driving him to the airport!
Pinko commie rag.
Pinko commie rag.
You can't. It's none of your business!
You can't. It's none of your business!
I'd like to have shoehorn hands.
I'd like to have shoehorn hands.
You don't think I can attract attention?
You don't think I can attract attention?
I mean, I was just being folksy.
I mean, I was just being folksy.
once they've seen Karl Hungus?
once they've seen Karl Hungus?
I've found the tunnel, Johnson! It's this way!
I've found the tunnel, Johnson! It's this way!
I think the chair is a fantastic gift idea,
I think the chair is a fantastic gift idea,
You know, fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict, drug regimen
You know, fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict, drug regimen
All right, Frank, that's enough.
All right, Frank, that's enough.
Not showing off, not falling behind.
Not showing off, not falling behind.
You didn't think I was rolling out of here naked, did you?
You didn't think I was rolling out of here naked, did you?
You wanna fight me? Jerry, I'm gonna kill you.
You wanna fight me? Jerry, I'm gonna kill you.
He just sunk like a stone, didn't he?
He just sunk like a stone, didn't he?
Yes, I'm, uh-- I'm causing dissent,
Yes, I'm, uh-- I'm causing dissent,
It's fraying.
It's fraying.
Tough luck, chinless.
Tough luck, chinless.
Friends like these, huh, Gary? That's right, Dude.
Friends like these, huh, Gary? That's right, Dude.
A Willard?
A Willard?
No, forget it. I don't want you to.
No, forget it. I don't want you to.
That's why they sent me. I am an expert.
That's why they sent me. I am an expert.
Oh, I got a big problem, Jerry!
Oh, I got a big problem, Jerry!
Oh, no, no. He has health problems.
Oh, no, no. He has health problems.
Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.
Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up.
I'm ruined!
I'm ruined!
I am looser than creamed corn.
I am looser than creamed corn.
My dirty undies, Dude. The laundry. The whites.
My dirty undies, Dude. The laundry. The whites.
Welcome aboard.
Welcome aboard.
Two oat sodas, Gary. Right. Good luck tomorrow.
Two oat sodas, Gary. Right. Good luck tomorrow.
We just swept the Orioles.
We just swept the Orioles.
GEORGE: Tippy toe! Tippy toe! Uh, lemon tree!
GEORGE: Tippy toe! Tippy toe! Uh, lemon tree!
Even I am not above the policy.
Even I am not above the policy.
Costanza, you're white-hot!
Costanza, you're white-hot!
He tried to lam, but they cheesed him.
He tried to lam, but they cheesed him.